- think that Aspergers treatments should focus on giving them the means to overcome the challenges associated by Aspergers rather than curing it
- support programs that respect the individuality of the Aspie
- prefer the word "education" over "treatment"
- try to “teach” other Aspergers individuals rather than “change” them
- are in favor of helping make the lives of people on the spectrum easier
Are you an adult with High-Functioning Autism or Asperger's? Are you in a relationship with someone on the autism spectrum? Are you struggling emotionally, socially, spiritually or otherwise? Then you've come to the right place. We are here to help you in any way we can. Kick off your shoes and stay awhile...
Aspergers: Disability or Unique Ability?
Any increasing number of men and women with Aspergers (High-Functioning Autism) are refusing to be classified as individuals with a disability, syndrome or disorder. They claim that Aspergers is not a disorder, but a “different way of thinking.” Many claim that a “cure” for Aspergers would destroy the original personality of the individual in a misguided attempt to replace them with a “neurotypical” (i.e., a person not on the spectrum).
The “different way of thinking” perspective supports the model of Aspergers that says that Aspergers is a fundamental part of who the Aspergers individual is – and that Aspergers is something that can’t be separated from the individual. As a result, some “different way of thinking” believers prefer to be referred to as “Aspergers people” instead of “people with Aspergers,” because “people WITH Aspergers” implies that Aspergers is something that can be removed from the individual.
Aspergers individuals with this perspective oppose the idea of a cure, because they see it as destroying the original personality of the individual, forcing them to imitate neurotypical people (which they believe is unnatural to the “Aspie”), simply to make mainstream society feel less threatened by the presence of men and women who are unique.
“Different way of thinking” believers assert that the “quirks” of Aspergers individuals should be tolerated as the differences of any minority group should be tolerated. When there is discussion about visions for a future where Aspergers has been eliminated, “different way of thinking” believers usually see this as an attempt to end of their culture and way of being.
“Different way of thinking” believers certainly would enjoy having fewer difficulties in life, and they find some aspects of Aspergers painful at times (e.g., sensory issues), but they don’t want to have to sacrifice their basic identities in order to make life easier. “Different way of thinking” believers strongly desire society to become more tolerant and accommodating instead of searching for a cure. These unique individuals:
The “different way of thinking” perspective is related to the controversy of the movement. Some moms and dads see Aspergers as something that gives their sons and daughters great difficulty in life, and therefore see Aspergers as a “disorder.” Adults with this perspective believe that a cure for Aspergers is in their kid’s best interest, because they see a cure as something that will alleviate suffering. This is certainly understandable, but at a different level, insulting.
Many researchers and doctors have the goal of eliminating Aspergers completely someday; they want there to be a future with no Aspergers. But, many Aspergers men and women see Aspergers as a natural human variation and not a “disorder,” thus they are opposed to attempts to eliminate it. In particular, there is opposition to prenatal genetic testing of Aspergers in unborn fetuses, which some believe might be possible in the future if Aspergers is genetic. Many scientists believe there will be a prenatal test for Aspergers (High-Functioning Autism) someday. Our culture has started to debate the ethics involved in the possible elimination of a genotype that has both unique challenges and abilities, which may be seen as messing with nature in general – and natural selection in particular.
Many Aspergers individuals believe that society has an opinion about Aspergers that is highly offensive. This opinion compares Aspergers to a “disease.” Thus, one of the goals of “pro-Aspergers” adults is to expose and challenge those claims they find distasteful. Similarly, Aspergers rights activists reject terming the reported increase in the Aspergers (High-Functioning Autism) population as an “epidemic” since the word epidemic implies that Aspergers is a disease.
If you are an Aspergers man or woman, and you're tired of hearing about all the "deficits" associated with the Aspergers condition – join the club! The world needs to know that there are many more positives associated with Aspergers than negatives. If Aspergers is “cured” someday – then there go all the positives out the window. These positives are well worth celebrating. Here are just a few:
1. How often do neurotypical individuals fail to notice what's in front of their eyes because they're distracted by social cues and random small talk? Individuals with Aspergers and High-Functioning Autism truly attend to the sensory input that surrounds them. Many have achieved the ideal of mindfulness.
2. How often do neurotypical individuals forget directions, or fail to take note of colors, names, and other details? Adults with Aspergers are usually more tuned-in to details. They may have a much better memory than their neurotypical friends for critical details.
3. If you've ever joined a group or club to “fit in,” you know how hard it is to be true to yourself. But for individuals with Aspergers, social expectations are often irrelevant. Interest and passion are what really matters – not meeting other’s expectations.
4. Individuals with Aspergers tend to be less concerned with outward appearance than their neurotypical friends. As a result, they worry less about brand names, hairstyles and other expensive - but unimportant - externals than most adults do.
5. We all claim to value the truth, but few of us are truly truthful. But to most Aspergers men and women, the truth is the truth. A good word from an Aspie is the real deal.
6. Most Aspergers individuals don't play head games, and they assume their partners/spouses won't either. That’s a refreshing change from the emotional roller coaster that damages many neurotypical relationships.
7. Who's Richer? Smarter? More talented? Prettier? For Aspergers individuals, these distinctions hold much less importance than for neurotypicals. Aspies often see through such surface appearances to discover the real person underneath.
Resources for ASD-NT Couples
“I am married to a man with Aspergers. I must say this has been the biggest challenge in my entire life. Although I do love my husband dea...
"Can an adult with Aspergers or High Functioning Autism have a meltdown just like a child with the same disorder?" Click here ...
A lot of men with Asperger’s (AS) – also called “high functioning autism” – have never been diagnosed and are regarded as being eccent...
You have a love Asperger's, and you don't understand him or her, so it's making you crazy? It doesn't have to be that wa...
Men with Aspergers have many traits that can be attractive to a prospective partner. Click here for the full article... ==> Liv...
People with Asperger’s and High Functioning Autism (HFA) often face challenges related to their ability to interpret certain social cu...
Many, if not most, females with Aspergers and High-Functioning Autism “slip through the net” (i.e., go undiagnosed) because they camoufl...
Depression drains your energy, hope, and drive, making it difficult to do what you need to feel better. But while overcoming bouts of de...
Too often, the microscope is focused on all that is wrong with Aspergers adults. Yet, these grown-ups actually have much to contribute t...
"One of the things I have learned while married to my husband with Aspergers syndrome is that I have to allow for processing time....