An Aspergers (High-Functioning Autism) man's brain varies tremendously over his life span, quickly contradicting the image of the emotionally-distant, self-absorbed “nerd” that circulates in mainstream consciousness. From his task-oriented personality to his “excessive” need for time alone, here's what women need to know about their partner's mind...
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“I am married to a man with Aspergers. I must say this has been the biggest challenge in my entire life. Although I do love my husband dea...
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"Out of the clear blue, my boyfriend with Aspergers stated he's not in love with me anymore, but doesn't want to break up. We...
In regards to item #2 you state: "They just have difficulty conveying that love in a meaningful way." If I may, the more accurate statement would be: They just have difficulty conveying that love in "the way that neurotypicals classify as meaningful." The expression of love may not be mainstream, however it is no less meaningful.
ReplyDeleteAdrienne, well said. What neurotypicals may need is a guide to help them understand what their Aspergers partner means by his/her gestures of love.
DeleteAbsolutely, It's really a very informative for me, although my colleague has faced same issue, after marriage she has found his husband also suffering from Aspergers syndrome disorder but the problem was partial for him. It is the common factors for every couples, for all time women knows the husbands brains conditions.
ReplyDeleteI'm loosing my boyfriend of 2years because I didn't know he had As and neither did he. I've done research and he fits all qualifications. I can't seem to understand him.
ReplyDeleteThat's pretty much how it goes. Neurotypicals get frustrated by us and just leave. Then we Aspies spend the next 2 months analyzing why we broke up, heartbroken, and confused. It's not easy for us to make it to the 6 month mark, let alone 2 years, or marriage before the NT's get frustrated. I've never dated another Aspie but someday I might try it. I figure it might be the first time in my life I actually understand someone.
DeleteIt does not always go that way. No relationship is easy.....everyone has its challenges. I am neurotypical and my husband has Aspergers (never officially diagnosed but we are pretty sure after three kiddos on spectrum). We have been married for 9 years....together 11. Do we sometimes have problems with understanding, yes. But I can tell you everyone I know in relationships have issues of one sort or the other. I personally appreciate my husbands honesty, his dedication to his work, his intelligence. Yes sometimes I feel frustrated. Counseling really helped us with communication. I love him so much and we both are determined to make this family work. All I can say is that there is someone out there for everyone.
Deleteregardless of knowing and understanding the above information, living with this can still leave the NT partner a shell of what they once were, the effects are tremendous and all of the understanding falls to us, so we end up completely damaged by the relationship. Not being mean, but 31 years in and I have been badly affected.
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