This phenomenon may grow from other roots as well, for example:
- Shame is an emotion where you hate yourself instead of your mistakes. When you feel shame, you feel as if your every move is wrong, and soon you feel self-condemnation for feeling that way. With shame, you believe that you are a mistake. Shame keeps you immobilized because of your fear of being wrong.
- Perfectionism is where people want things to be better than they are. However, they soon reach a point where nothing is good enough. When they get criticized, or when something they have done is criticized, they feel like they have failed. They hate themselves for not being “perfect.”
- People can easily begin thinking bad things about themselves if they notice they don’t fit the mold of society or their family’s expectations. And society usually won’t tell them anything different about themselves.
- An individual might be “different,” or they might have some bad circumstances in their life that causes them to not be able to develop quality relationships. Others notice this strangeness, and insensitively point it out to the person or mock them.
As one man with AS states: "It's so easy to get caught up in this type of mindset, especially when you don't know the reason why it seems like everything you do fails. I tend to think one of the most important reasons to seek out an Asperger's diagnosis is to help understand that the mistakes you were making were because of something beyond your control. That isn't to say you can turn around and blame everything that has ever gone wrong on your life on Asperger's, but you at least have a starting point on where you can start to change."
==> Living With Aspergers: Help for Couples
==> Skype Counseling for Struggling Couples Affected by Asperger's and HFA