Are you an adult with High-Functioning Autism or Asperger's? Are you in a relationship with someone on the autism spectrum? Are you struggling emotionally, socially, spiritually or otherwise? Then you've come to the right place. We are here to help you in any way we can. Kick off your shoes and stay awhile...

Search This Blog

Challenges Facing Wives Who Are Married to Aspergers Husbands

The challenges facing some women who are married to a man with Aspergers (high-functioning autism) can be difficult to navigate. These challenges may be completely hidden to other family members, friends and co-workers. No one seems to understand what the wife struggles with. Her husband may seem to be a “good guy” who appears perfectly "normal" to everyone else.

CLICK HERE for the full article...

16 comments:

  1. I need someone to talk to about this. I can't be the only one that needs someone else to talk to about the struggles that come with loving someone with aspergers. If you feel the same way please email me

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I will chat! I feel like this article was written for m specifically.

      Delete
    2. Hi Ladies, I too feel the same way. I am trying so hard. Married 12 years and Adpie husband is just recently accepting. I still feel "trapped".

      Delete
  2. 22 years in and I have reached, what feels like, my limit. I'm not sure how much I am expected to deal with. I see him trying but then he easily slips back into Old patterns. I always look like the bad guy and the bitch. I hate that I can't be my best self with him. Struggling is putting it mildly. So much Despair and hopelessness that some days I just want to take my son and run away. But I don't. I Stay through the betrayals and the lies knowing that all of this comes from his very wounded place on top of having Asperger's. Self-care is my new motto. I have requested designated days that are mine to do whatever fills my cup. We have very different interests yes. He is completely absorbed with his work. I'm as social being so I have to meet my social needs on my own. Still working it out. I haven't left because I know that I have growing to do myself. The relationship definitely can be a place of growth for me. Plus I love him very much. Really is a mixed bag LOL

    ReplyDelete
  3. I vote for starting an online support group! Who's with me???

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes! I will join! I can't afford to pay for the therapy needed (for spouse, myself and my kids) so I am left feeling almost hopeless and stuck. Support from others like myself are all I have at the moment.

      Delete
  4. ok so what are these different behaviours we can learn to heal our broken life!? 17 years in and I've lost all hope! and to double the devastation our 11 yr old son is also high functioning autistic and has challenging behaviour and pathological demand avoidance! if I can't fix my relationship with his dad! my husband! what chance has my son got in his life!?? he needs to see there is a way to be in a relationship and work together and be a life long couple with someone you love and have a loving relationship between the two of you that works for the both of you!

    ReplyDelete
  5. There are a few groups on FB for NT (neurotypical) wives of Aspergers partners or husbands. I've found them to be a HUGE help.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Could you please be more specific with the names of the groups? I would be very interested in them. Thank you.

      Delete
  6. I hope that I don't get negative comments but I feel like I'm in prison and only 7 yrs into my life sentence. All hope and happiness is gone. I have 2 girls and am a stay at home mom. I'm so lonely! So much hurt, rejection, lies, abandonment, devalued, just hopeless! I'm tired and just want to run away and never come back. How am I gonna get through all this?! Thank you ladies for sharing!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh my gosh, are you me?? We are living strikingly similar lives. I am 11 years into the relationship; 8 of those years married. I have two daughters and am a stay at home mom as well. I understand what you are feeling and what you are experiencing. I have actually expressed how confining this life feels and have used imprisonment as an example for my spouse. He does not understand. It feels hopeless. I feel wasted away.

      I am just glad that I have run across others who can understand and help me not feel like I am crazy.. :( I am here if you or anyone else needs to vent or need someone to just understand and empathize. <3

      Delete
  7. I’m 49 and married to a man with Aspergers. Sadly he had a stroke 5 years ago which changed his personality for the worse. It’s become unbearable. Denial, deflection, an inability to see he’s wrong, aggressive and I tread on eggshells every day. My children have all been bullied out of the house because of his way or the highway rules and I went to work today and came home to him gone. No word or anything. I met up and he said he’s not doing it anymore as though he’s the victim. This is an annual occurrence and I have weekly threats of him leaving me every time life gets a bit tough. Basically I’ve had enough. I think it’s time I walked away and found someone who actually does love me and does understand people. :(

    ReplyDelete
  8. I can relate. Almost 30 years. It just keep getting worst.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Please! I needed all of these comments. I am struggling to find support groups in my area and I am in agony. Any resources will be utilized by me at this point. My husband quite literally changed overnight.

    ReplyDelete

Popular Posts

Chat for Adults with HFA and Aspergers