We polled 40 “neurotypical” women who are (or where) in a marriage with an Asperger’s husband and asked the following question: “Were you married to man with Asperger’s and are now divorced?”
Their responses fell into 4 general categories: (1) married with no plans for divorce; (2) married, but one or both spouses are making plans for divorce; (3) divorced; and (4) married, but separated.
Here’s the statistical outcome of the survey:
Their responses fell into 4 general categories: (1) married with no plans for divorce; (2) married, but one or both spouses are making plans for divorce; (3) divorced; and (4) married, but separated.
Here’s the statistical outcome of the survey:
- 28 women stated: Married with no plans for divorce (70%)
- 6 women stated: Married, but one or both spouses are making plans for divorce (15%)
- 4 women stated: Divorced (10%)
- 2 women stated: Married, but separated (5%)
In summary:
- In this survey, the divorce rate was only 10%.
- 70% of these women are married (many of which stated they are “hanging in there,” but “dissatisfied” with the marriage).
- 30% are in some state of marital difficulty, or have already divorced.
We also did a related poll in which we asked both men and women (43 participants total) in which one partner is affected by Asperger's or high-functioning autism the following question:
What is the current status of your relationship with your partner?
- Still together and mostly happy with the relationship
- Still together but mostly unhappy with the relationship
- Still together but considering separation or divorce
- Planning for separation or divorce
- Already separated or divorced
- Other
Here are their answers (anonymously):
- Anonymous said… Still together and mostly happy in large part due to weekly couples counseling with a therapist who specializes in Adults with Asperger's
- Anonymous said…Still together after 29 years but considering therapy to combat loneliness and frustration in the marriage.
- Anonymous said… Married 18 years and happy but sometimes lonely.
- Anonymous said… Not happy. 20 years. Considering separation.
- Anonymous said… Still together and mostly happy with the relationship
- Anonymous said… Still together as roommates and companions. Serious thought to divorce
- Anonymous said… Haven't had a partner for 5 years and very happy with that
- Anonymous said… Divorced for many years and very happy with my relationship with him now after many years.
- Anonymous said… Been together 1 year and happy 98% of the time
- Anonymous said… Still together and mostly happy with the relationship. We are engaged and have been dating for 5 1/2 years.
- Anonymous said… Married for better or worse 26 years ago. Many rough patches but still together and mostly happy 😊
- Anonymous said… Happily together since 1992, married since 2007. For the most part things are good but we have major work/life balance issues. We are DINKS (Dual Income, No Kids)
- Anonymous said… Still together and mostly happy with the relationship xx
- Anonymous said… ` Still together and mostly happy with the relationship
- Anonymous said… Celebrated 21 years of marriage two weeks ago. Mostly happy after at least 10+ years of very hard work and two separations, one for 2 months and the second 2 years later for 9 months. There were years I wished desperately I had left.
- Anonymous said… Still together - separated, but not legally.
- Anonymous said… was married for 16 years and now divorced for almost 10 years.
- Anonymous said… Still together 34 years and 75% happy?
- Anonymous said… Still together and mostly happy with the relationship. I have learned how to deal with all his quirks and when to just let things go. We have been married 23 years. It is just a "different kind of relationship" that works for both of us! I think most NT's would have divorced one another.
- Anonymous said… Still together 15 yrs married and 5 knowing him. Mostly happy. Sex isn’t there. But he’s fine with an open relationship. So I have options.
- Anonymous said… Still together and mostly happy with the relationship. *WITH SHORT BURSTS OF ABSOLUTE HIDEOUSNESS
- Anonymous said… Still together. Happy for almost 7 years. The last year has been a roller coaster.
- Anonymous said… Still together (married a little over a year), planning to stay together & find a way to be mostly happy, but not quite sure how yet . . .
- Anonymous said… Still together but mostly unhappy with the relationship,together 11years with 4 children
- Anonymous said… Seperated, after 13yrs of marriage.
- Anonymous said… 33 years married and miserable.
- Anonymous said… Still together and mostly happy with the relationship. 27 years and counting.
- Anonymous said… Married 18 years, divorced
- Anonymous said… Still together and mostly happy we have our struggles but I love is pulling us through where patience fails
- Anonymous said… 6 months married and mostly happy 💜
- Anonymous said… Still together and very happy
- Anonymous said… Still together and been married nearly 31 years. Mostly happy now but certainly had some challenges like all relationships and tend to feel lonely now and again.
- Anonymous said… Married 37 years to a wonderful man who tries very hard to be present, loving and considerate.
- Anonymous said… 30yrs. Still together and mostly happy with the relationship.
- Anonymous said… Still together and mostly happy. 16 years and going strong ❤️
- Anonymous said… Still together and mostly deliriously happy, sometimes miserable. 😄
- Anonymous said… Still together but somewhat unhappy with the relationship, still trying though. I'm neurotypical and he's hfa
- Anonymous said… Separated but still in specialized therapy so we can co-habitats and co-parent together. Thank god we have a little guest house out back. I no longer feel like a hostage in my own home. This took 4 years for me to get to. Both of us committed to making this work for the kids. 8 more years to go!!!
- Anonymous said… Already divorced but not due to the autism issue - that was diagnosed afterwards for the child
- Anonymous said… Still together but mostly unhappy with the relationship.
- Anonymous said… Divorced and trying to coparent
- Anonymous said… Still together and mostly happy with the relationship. (13 years
- Anonymous said... other
==> Living With Aspergers: Help for Couples
==> Skype Counseling for Struggling Couples Affected by Asperger's and HFA
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