tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-212330848782074107.post5329701061037918313..comments2024-03-18T07:20:14.358-07:00Comments on Support & Education for Adults on the Autism Spectrum: Why Some ASD Men Fall Out of Love - Seemingly OvernightUnknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger46125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-212330848782074107.post-72508386855621373472024-03-03T12:00:12.717-08:002024-03-03T12:00:12.717-08:00I am so grateful to have stumbled onto this discus...I am so grateful to have stumbled onto this discussion. Like many of us, I am trying to work though the aftermath of loving someone who I believe has high functioning autism (he has never been diagnosed and he would be angry with me if I brought up this topic). My husband of 2 years, 4 together, left me abruptly last July after admitting to having an affair with a co-worker, he got her pregnant and now has a two month old son. It was like he changed overnight, he was never humble about what he had done, and he is so angry with me for expecting that he would be faithful. <br /><br />We are still married, in no contact, and he just tells me he want his stuff and to move forward with his life. It is as if he became an unfeeling robot. This man who has told me that he has always loved me. <br /><br />It helps to read these comments and know that I am not alone in having this kind of experience. I started thinking he might be on the spectrum a while back, then when I watched "Love on the Spectrum", I could see so many characteristics (mild) that he has in interactions with me and others. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-212330848782074107.post-85950715789417055372024-02-24T22:04:30.450-08:002024-02-24T22:04:30.450-08:00I can totally empathise with all the above. I was ...I can totally empathise with all the above. I was with my aspbergic partner for 13 years. It was the happiest time of my entire life and we got on so well, never fell out, and were always respectful to each other. He told me he wanted to end our relationship. No warning, no nothing.<br />Said he thought I had gone off him. I explained I had been going through a difficult time, which I then explained to him. He replied with “well that makes sense of things, but you should have told me 2 weeks ago, I want to get to know someone else”. I am beyond devastated and after 7 months apart am still struggling to get my head around this. I miss him so much. I cannot understand how he can move from being so loving to so cold in such a short time.<br />He left me for someone 15 years younger - a rebound and perhaps a midlife crisis.<br />It hurts so much to have invested so much into our relationship and be discarded like this with no discussion or attempt to resolve anything.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-212330848782074107.post-34957068997677163832024-02-09T21:22:39.242-08:002024-02-09T21:22:39.242-08:00Ah! I was with my Asperger partner for 5 years. Go...Ah! I was with my Asperger partner for 5 years. Got engaged after 3 months, he ended it after a year because he realised he didn’t want to get married (he was masking for the first 9 months) (I said at the beginning if he didn’t want marriage or kids to just leave me alone and he was adamant he wanted both). Worked for 10 months to get back together … broke ok a couple times in between. Last Saturday I was crying as I was made redundant and I’m stressed and he told me to stop crying because it was effing annoying and I pushed to see what his problem was and he said he thinks he wants to be alone, with his cats, as a recluse, you can love someone and not want to be with them (we were planning on me moving in a month ago and I didn’t think there was anything wrong). We were going well then he went back to work which he hated his job and he started getting worse, distancing, communication was lacking etc and now since he ended it last week … completely ignored me, threw me out of his life as “his way of function and coping”. Ignored all my messages and is just being cruel. I don’t know how they can go from loving you to literally acting as if your dead. I feel so alone. I got used to the compromising, mood swings and the usual Asperger characteristics and treated him so well so him just being like “oh I don’t wanna be with anyone” after 5 freaking years and just leaving it as that … they leave such a hole in your heart and sanity, they ruin your self esteem, fk with your mental health. I did a list and the cons outweigh the pros by a lot and I know long term the relationship with a HFA guy would be a struggle with the hot cold personality, not wanting to commit, different wants and morals etc but it still hurts so much. He says he loves me but the way his acting says differently. Any advice would be appreciated 😞Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-212330848782074107.post-5933134348052337132024-01-01T20:42:47.814-08:002024-01-01T20:42:47.814-08:00Be thankful you got out! I’m sorry you had to go t...Be thankful you got out! I’m sorry you had to go through such a terrible ordeal. It’s not you! Based on what you’re describing, he is incapable of empathy. Avoid him at all cost. Do not reply if he tries to contact you again. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-212330848782074107.post-18874805574082364542023-12-21T22:06:20.941-08:002023-12-21T22:06:20.941-08:00I've been in a relationship with an AS partner...I've been in a relationship with an AS partner for 8 years and only in the past 3 years did I realise he was on the spectrum. As it was a long-distance relationship at first it masked a lot of the problems, and it was only evident once he moved in with me. He left after only a month, and lived by himself, and after two years has back to his home country. We continued for a while as he kept promising to come back, but all promises were never kept, and I am sure that he was lying to me about many things. He hid a lot of things, has never introduced me to his family or friends and refused this consistently. He just came over for what was supposed to be our first Christmas together, and when I was out one day he packed up and went home leaving just a note to say sorry. I returned home to an empty house and a note. I feel completely devastated, I gave a lot to the relationship, read up on how to communicate better, joined a support group for partners and we spent money on ND relationship counselling. I am walking away now to regain my life and happiness, and try not to regret the past 8 years. I feel completely used, humiliated and extremely hurt, but I know that he has no empathy or understanding of how destructive his behaviour has been.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-212330848782074107.post-66284381509432620252023-11-14T15:39:01.817-08:002023-11-14T15:39:01.817-08:00A couple of days after the departure i received a ...A couple of days after the departure i received a message from him saying that he hoped i didn't claim an interest in his property otherwise he might claim for my property.... <br />I'm still trying to survive after this terrible breakup, didn't hear from him for a month but have received a long email from him recently saying that he "didn't want the relationship to end, he just had a terrible mental breakdown, and he feels he lost something wonderful and important forever..." The email froze me for a while but I made myself answer and thank him for all the good moment and wish him the best. It's really hard to trust people after this experience, the only thing I'm sure about is that my low self-esteem and childhood traumas attracted a narcissist and a person with the lack of attachment and responsibility. Now I realise I've got so much to work on, this terrible story opened the darkest corners of my mind and I have to take care of myself to resurrect and be able to take care of my kids and start a new happy relationship one day...<br />Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-212330848782074107.post-7320721331878637972023-11-14T15:38:19.175-08:002023-11-14T15:38:19.175-08:00I was travelling alone with two kids, two suitcase...I was travelling alone with two kids, two suitcases, two backpacks, a laptop bag and a stroller (my ex didn't even offer me any help with that) but i was so blind with love that i was doing some impossible things at that time. One of our flights was cancelled due to the military situation in Armenia (was definitely a bad sign) so i had to take a taxi at 2am with all my luggage and the kids and cross the Georgian border. All in all, I crossed 5 borders in 2 days to get to my final destination!!! My new husband picked us up at the airport (no flowers... never...which had always been strange for me), brought us to his house and we had a really good time at the first 3 days... then he brought his 2 sons from their mom's place and everything changed. My lil daughter didn't sleep well at night and kept crying, the older daughter started protesting (argued with the youngest son of my new husband). I noticed that my ex became distant, didn't come up to me, didn't talk much, spent most of the time with his kids and i felt lonely and abandoned - no friends, no family around and the only person i know at a new place started kind of ignoring me... at some point i bursted out and told him about it which lead to some terrible consequences. First he replied that my words made him insecure and "maybe I should consider going back to my country"; a couple of days later he informed me that "he was afraid it might not work out". I couldn't believe my ears - i came 3000 km from abroad bringing 2 kids and my stuff, sold the car, changed the whole life but my husband "changed his mind". For the 4-5 next days i tried to talk to him, persuade to give it a try... (during that period my daughter started going to a new school already, we applied for residency etc.) In a couple of days my ex repeated his words that he thought we needed to go back to my country because he "couldn't handle that", "he was too weak", "he didn't have any energy left". At that particular moment he was changing his job and was all occupied with this process so when i tried to talk, kept sending messages and crying - he was very cold and distant. I felt as if I had a big hole in my chest - we had so many plans together, my family and friends said goodbye to me and the kids two weeks before that and now i had to go back - all defeated and broken to the core... After the agony phase i finally told my ex I respected his decision and was ready to leave. We spent the last 4 days sleeping on my older daughter's hideaway IKEA bed (me and the 2 kids) - my ex never asked if we were comfortable enough or maybe offered to change bedrooms...nothing. On the day of the departure he took us to the airport and gave me 200 Euros in case of "emergency" only after I mentioned it (my credit cards weren't accepted on the territory of the EU). I might have had difficulties with my departure because i didn't have any confirmation of applying for residency yet (the time period was too short for the departments to process the papers yet). But when we came to the airport my ex said "there are no parking lots so let me just drop you off here (2 kids, 2 suitcases, a stroller, 2 backpacks and a laptop bag) - just call in case of emergency".... I was totally shocked - as if i was dealing with a cold-blooded monster, i had never known him well enough to see that side of his... No goodbye, nothing, just a weird short message from him that he was sorry everything had turned out that way...He filed for divorce immediately and cancelled my language course subsription (even though it was a present). Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-212330848782074107.post-74856613346636477192023-11-14T15:37:18.191-08:002023-11-14T15:37:18.191-08:00Let me share my crazy story with you as well. I me...Let me share my crazy story with you as well. I met my ex at an international dating website about 14 months ago. Prior to that I was married to a narcissist for 12 years, have two daughters with that person, but he left me for another woman when my second daughter was 3 months old. I felt really devastated after that experience and in about 6 months after the divorce i decided to register at an international dating website. There I met my ex - we felt that special "connection" immediately, he was also going through a divorce so I thought we had a lot in common. We could chat for hours, he sent looong letters declaring love and affection. First time we met each other over the weekend in Turkey - i went there on vacation with my little daughter. Then he came to my country to celebrate the New Year together. There were some red flags back then but i didn't want to notice any of those - i thought it was just due to the difference in mentality (he seemed to be cold at moments; he never gave me any clarity about our mutual future especially when he was leaving after our rare meetings - i seemed to be "pushing" him all the time to take serious decisions in the relationship). Some things he said didn't sound nice at all but when i reacted he tried to persuade he had meant something different. At some point he mentioned that his older son was on spectrum but i had no idea what it was about and couldn't even think my ex was also autistic. I knew he needed to spend some time on his own, he liked reading a lot, he had a lot of "nerdy" hobbies like creating a "battle field game" (not sure about the term) and painting little miniatures for it, gardening etc. but i even liked it cos for me those were the signs that the man was serious and family-oriented. My ex seemed to be obsessed with me a bit - he had my pics as wallpapers on his gadgets, he put our photos and all my presents at a visible place at his living room (not very typical for a man but i adored it). After about 10 months of the relationship i started saying that i didn't like that long-distance version (going back and forth, no real connection) and after considering all the options my ex "proposed" in a very formal way - with no ring, no romance just saying that he calculated everything and we might be able to afford living together (with four kids under one roof). I got the visa (all the paperwork was extremely complicated) and went to my ex for us to get married in his country. Then i came back home, sold my car, sent 100kg of my stuff via an international delivery company, prepared all the papers for the kids - you can't even imagine how much effort it required (almost begged my ex husband to give the permission to allow the kids to travel with me and help with the visas) and finally in 1,5 months I was ready to fly to my new husband and start a new life abroad. <br />Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-212330848782074107.post-57013380616919262012023-11-03T16:53:56.535-07:002023-11-03T16:53:56.535-07:00Look like you both are gross and ungrateful people...Look like you both are gross and ungrateful people in general and just blaming your problems on autism. Is terrible for people who have autism and have no such problem.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-212330848782074107.post-36333237972096675612023-10-21T00:32:18.076-07:002023-10-21T00:32:18.076-07:00Are you the one with autism? I’m an Aspie in a gr...Are you the one with autism? I’m an Aspie in a great long term relationship.Zannnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-212330848782074107.post-34565908807610457102023-10-09T21:58:10.418-07:002023-10-09T21:58:10.418-07:00Great response. I agree! Great response. I agree! Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-212330848782074107.post-86308985498956041582023-10-05T00:33:25.275-07:002023-10-05T00:33:25.275-07:00Oh my gosh. I can really resonate. Similar sorry 1...Oh my gosh. I can really resonate. Similar sorry 18 months together. Everything was lovely and wonderful. He went to a festival and came back and finished things with me, out of nowhere. Says he can’t be in relationship and doesn’t want any responsibilities. He’s been cold and kind of mean to me since when I have tried to get my things back from his.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-212330848782074107.post-35926677047570805762023-10-04T10:08:12.557-07:002023-10-04T10:08:12.557-07:00Wow! I and so glad I came across this page.
I hav...Wow! I and so glad I came across this page.<br /><br />I have very strong suspicions that my ex is on the spectrum. His grandfather was autistic and a lot of the behaviours he exhibits, point to this. <br /><br />We were together 18 months. He told me he was in love with me the night we met. I just brushed it off. But his quirks very sweet and endearing. I fell in love with him. I was going through a very hard time, because my mom was dying of cancer at the time, and she passed away a year ago. He said he always be there for me, I was his soulmate and he’d do anything for me. We’ve had a couple of difficult times this year, and I know he was overwhelmed with work. But otherwise, he was still being loving and affectionate. He went to a festival couple of months ago, lost his phone, came back and split up with me. Said his head isn’t in the right place to be in a relationship. I was not happy with his explanation. I met up with him to get some things off him a few weeks after. He said he wasn’t in love with me and hadn’t been for the last year (jan-aug)! For apparently 8 months he didn’t love me and didn’t have the balls to breakup with me. But I find that really hard to believe? He could be so bluntly honest a lot of the time so I don’t know how he could have lied like that for 8 months. Having read this now, I feel like I was his obsession, not his love. And now I have been cast aside like I am nothing, it hurts deeply.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-212330848782074107.post-55994078525822881752023-09-17T16:23:14.894-07:002023-09-17T16:23:14.894-07:00I was with my Aspergers partner for 3 years, with ...I was with my Aspergers partner for 3 years, with a 7 month break between each 1.5 year. He ended it two weeks ago saying we are no longer compatible. I’m absolutely heartbroken. We have a 2 year old son together. I don’t know how to move past the pain. We planned our future together and everything and he has ripped it from under us. I miss him so much and love him with every part of me. I Loved him unconditionally, done everything for him. For him to leave like I was nothing. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-212330848782074107.post-23855754194133219812023-09-11T07:31:36.047-07:002023-09-11T07:31:36.047-07:00. Like nothing ever happened. He promised me he wa.... Like nothing ever happened. He promised me he was feeling better and would try to really work on everything and I believed him. I would read books, articles, support groups and everything to just try to understand him better and love him in his way. I never wanted him to feel like anything was wrong with him. Ultimately; things started to get rough again. The only thing I would ask from him was communication. So if you want to be alone. That’s cool just let me know so I know not to bother you or if you feeling overstimulated just let me know so I can be where you need me. I never wanted him to change, I was open to changing because I realized it was easier for me to change… not him and that’s real love. One day we were arguing, and i just got overwhelmed so I drove 2 hours to his house to sit down and talk with him. He was so upset and said I crossed a boundary by coming not knowing what he had going on, but we were arguing so bad I just really came in peace to try to rectify the situation and show him, like hey I’m here working through everything with you .. never did I think he would take it so bad. He went on this whole rant about how I’ll never understand and then he told me I was right, I only ask him for one thing but the reason it’s hard for him to give it to me is because he grew up watching his father not communicate, being abusive, selfish, and never having to explain himself.. so it makes him really angry when he has to. I’ve never seen him in that light before, I tried to give him a hug and it wasn’t the Same type of hugs he normally gives. He was irritated because he wanted to go watch football and felt like because I was there he couldn’t but I told him I would leave and he didn’t want me to because it was late. It just was all over the place. I stayed the night there and we slept together but it was different. The next morning I left and I sent him a voice memo, apologizing for invading his space and thanking him for opening up to me… but he texted me back and said he thinks we need a break for a bit, to reset. I’m unsure what that means. So I’m giving him this break but honestly after all of the stories you guys shared in saying they’ll never change, even if he did come back I don’t think I can do it. I was open to working with him because I love him and I wasn’t going to let him being on the spectrum defeat our love, but if they never gone change and always mask it then it’s no point because it is a lonely relationship. They don’t know no better … but they are naturally selfish, Bratty and childlike and unless you are selfless, super patient and loving you not gone see them past their flaws. I love him, I really do but he had more then autism. He had alexiythemia as well as child hood trauma he needed to deal with and as bad and open as I was to go down the journey with him and show him what true love was… I don’t think he understood that , nor was prepared for the journey. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-212330848782074107.post-83745816536213554842023-09-11T07:31:15.133-07:002023-09-11T07:31:15.133-07:00I wanted to do and that’s just when I noticed some...I wanted to do and that’s just when I noticed something was terribly off, really bad. He was really just weird towards me. One day I texted him about it and he apologized and told me he had high functioning autism. He never ever told me that from the beginning … immediately I decided to terminate my baby even though I didn’t want to because I just didn’t want to put myself through something I couldn’t handle. I knew he loved me but by his actions I just knew he wasn’t going to be able to there for me and the baby in the way I needed him to. He was displaying those lead qualities actions. After the abortion we didn’t talk for 2 weeks. He reached out to me, he came over, we had a long talk and I thought he understood and we were going to try dating again but it was really hard. He was going through alot of changes and work and he would just shut me out, not communicate, just really be cold towards me. One thing he always did was remind me that he loved me and that it wasn’t me, it’s him but it still felt really Lonely. After a bad argument one day, we stopped talking again for 2 weeks and I started therapy. My therapist broke down everything to me and told me how difficult it would be to date him, have kids with him and the challenges. I decided to text him a few days later to check on him, and like nothing, we were back to it again. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-212330848782074107.post-12128852601569837292023-09-11T07:30:30.300-07:002023-09-11T07:30:30.300-07:00I met the guy I was dating in January of this year...I met the guy I was dating in January of this year. He was super sweet and nice and at first I could always tell something was off…. But due to the history of guys I had dated in the past I wanted something different. He wasn’t the typical guy I would go after, he was different. At first because we were friends his mannerisms use to just seem very “nervous like”.. I would notice he would ask me the same things over and over, I constantly had to repeat myself and he would get slightly agitated at small things. He also was very calculated… anytime we hung out was on a timed schedule.. no spontaneity. After about 2 months of being friends, we started have intercourse with each other and after about a month of that, I actually found out I was pregnant. Lord, that was the toughest thing I ever had to go through. He literally switched up on me so quick.. it was like he was trying to still be nice but he had this mean, cold side. I actually stayed with him for 4 weeks as I was trying to make a decision about what Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-212330848782074107.post-7712142807809584492023-09-03T18:20:28.307-07:002023-09-03T18:20:28.307-07:00Married for 35 years .Began to understand this is ...Married for 35 years .Began to understand this is the condition he has.I first saw him as strong, quiet, and humble...along with handsome, hardworking and generous.The first year was wonderful, showered with attention and loyalty.Children came along, and his job took him away for 5 years...just visits.Being busy with 3 kids and a job didnt give me time to think about any more problems.Just hoping for the day he came home.He did ,for about 2 years.Then took another job overseas ...for 3 years...home for a year..than another overseas job for 5 years., I would visit and joke that were still dating. This kind of relationship is isolating, doesn't provide support.. emotionally, and limits communication .I began reading the bible for comfort and found A love stronger than mine.I look at what I have now, and continue to be thankful for those things.A relationship with God is the only perfect one. Now,He is retired like me and we are still married because I cant divorce in the eyes of God. He still does his own thing.He is polite, pays the bills and loves to cook.I know this is the life God has given me, and I find joy in so many things in life.I know its a very different path being married to someone with autism,.Yes, it requires so much from a person to endure feelings of rejection...But, there are no 2 people alike.And each one of us will have trials in our life. Mine showed me that I wasnt strong enough to go through it alone...God supplies our need..Its good to know about autism and how it affects relationships..Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-212330848782074107.post-44075485880719595412023-08-18T09:47:32.028-07:002023-08-18T09:47:32.028-07:00This sounds really difficult. I hope you've co...This sounds really difficult. I hope you've come out the other side stronger. I can relate to a lot of this - my partner calls me anxious when I want to talk about our future, and calls me needy even though I'm independent and we've been in a long-distance relationship for most of six years. But I do feel insecure sometimes because of the distance and that would be evident in some ways. I regularly feel empty in his presence, and now I feel wary when he's sweet to me because I know it won't last and I have zero control over it. He never wants to talk about my past, or his. Addiction is such a good explanation!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-212330848782074107.post-70914340573669025942023-08-05T14:43:56.259-07:002023-08-05T14:43:56.259-07:00My autistic bf also dumped me two weeks ago. Out ...My autistic bf also dumped me two weeks ago. Out of the blue. After 1.5 years of him acting like he had never met anyone so wonderful, 1.5 years of just intense love and laughter and us both behaving like we were soul mates, he literally disappeared. It's been two weeks and he has yet to contact me or tell me why he has stopped all contact. There was some hot/cold nonsense that truly confused me in the midst of our relationship, but he never just disappeared. Before, I put it down to his neuro diversity and never pushed him. But now, just suddenly, nothing. Last time I saw him he told me he was tired. Then gone!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-212330848782074107.post-27399804573149669592023-07-28T14:18:37.820-07:002023-07-28T14:18:37.820-07:00As an autistic woman I’ve unfortunately done what ...As an autistic woman I’ve unfortunately done what the autistic man did with work. And being consumed by obsession. I would like to apologize for our behavior. No excuse to do it if we know better for sure, which, now I do thanks to you. I gaslit my ex over his perspective for 5 years and now he has given up on true love. I always thought he was the bad guy but it was me. I truly wish I could balance work (survival) with a partner. But we do obsess over partners and work is survival, so he sounded like a misogynistic fuck but I know what he means. I would hope he learns to be self aware one day and see how he hurt you so he considers more before seeing someone againAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-212330848782074107.post-1635780679628704602023-07-28T08:57:30.093-07:002023-07-28T08:57:30.093-07:00Maybe I won't get the answer from anyone that ...Maybe I won't get the answer from anyone that would find themselves on this page. But does ANYONE find success in a neuro-diverse relationship? Looking for hope because I'm not quite ready to throw in the towel but I can't find a single success story... even if success is lower expectations. Johnnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-212330848782074107.post-87776884548239104322023-07-20T10:41:09.028-07:002023-07-20T10:41:09.028-07:00I also got dumped on July 3. It was so awful. Im s...I also got dumped on July 3. It was so awful. Im so depressed. I blame myself but not being different. I wasn't my best self in the relationship but I felt like I had another kid. I did everything for him. I was so tired. He complained that I wasn't sexy and stuff. But I was running a household and working and he worked and focused on himself. Im so confused. Like an off switch and now that's it, I'm dumped Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-212330848782074107.post-45687520813741625792023-07-12T00:06:53.642-07:002023-07-12T00:06:53.642-07:00Personally, people have the ability to change. It’...Personally, people have the ability to change. It’s called accountability. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-212330848782074107.post-70664958745204469702023-07-12T00:02:41.059-07:002023-07-12T00:02:41.059-07:00Do not try to make sense of the situation. It’s NO...Do not try to make sense of the situation. It’s NOT you. I’ve dated a man on the spectrum and often doubted and second guess myself, because of his hot/cold behavior. I’ve been extremely patient and supportive about his need for “alone time” and routines. However, after 1.5 years, there’s a lack of reciprocity and support. When we spend time together, everything seems to revolve around his schedule. Further, he doesn’t include me in decisions about long term goals. For example, he discussed getting married, we go ring shopping, talk about moving in together, but he does a 180 and takes a management position and doesn’t feel the need to tell me he was promoted. Further, he becomes cold and mean. I spoke to close friends and they told be to run! Prioritize your needs…feelings…wants. Do NOT allow someone else to diminish your worth. If he does not cherish you, respect you and is not a loyal partner, then you need to move on. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com