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Problems Processing Information: The Main Reason ASD Partners Don’t Follow Through with NTs’ Requests

"Does the autistic brain have problems processing sensory and emotional information? My husband [on the autism spectrum] rarely follows through with what he originally agrees to do [or later, states he did not understand what I said, or simply does not remember the conversation at all]."

People on the spectrum often have problems processing information from one or more of their 7 sensory systems. These processes take place at an unconscious level and work together to help with attention and learning. Each system has specific receptors that pickup information that is relayed to the brain. The sensory traits of people with ASD are often responsible for their processing difficulties, negative behaviors, and unpleasant emotions.

The sensory systems are also involved in “emotional processing.” People with autism spectrum disorder vary in their ability to process information emotionally, in part because at least one other sense often doesn't work well (e.g., it would be difficult for spouse with an auditory-processing issue to figure out whether his wife’s voice suggests composure or irritation). Also, many of these individuals have a hard time using their emotions or desires to process information and act appropriately in interpersonal settings.

Processing is a system that helps people select, prepare, and begin to interpret incoming information. People with ASD who have difficulty with processing may have a range of problems related to regulating the use of incoming information.

There are five processing skills:

1. Cognitive activation is a form of “active processing” that connects new information to what has already been learned through prior knowledge and experience. People who are “inactive processors” are unable to connect to prior knowledge to assist their understanding of new information. In contrast, “overactive processors” are reminded of too much prior knowledge, making it difficult for them to maintain focus.

2. Depth and detail of processing controls how intensely people can concentrate on highly specific data. It enables them to focus deeply enough to recognize and remember necessary details. People with ASD tend to remember a lot of details that relate to their area of special interest, but may not remember much outside of that interest.

3. Focal maintenance allows the person to focus on important information for the appropriate period of time. Individuals on the spectrum may not concentrate long enough on some things, and may concentrate too long on others.

4. Saliency determination involves selecting which incoming information is the most important. People who have difficulty with this control may be distracted by things that are not relevant and miss important information being presented.

5. Satisfaction control involves a person’s ability to allocate enough attention to activities or topics of moderate or low levels of interest. People with ASD with poor satisfaction control have difficulty concentrating on activities that are outside of their special interest.

Here are some signs that your ASD husband has difficulty processing information:  

  • tries to understand the meaning of each word you are saying rather than being able to automatically understand the whole gist and general meaning of your sentence
  • processes too little or too much information
  • processes one word that you say, but then thinks of something completely unrelated to what you are saying
  • only pays attention to exciting information or highly stimulating activities
  • misses a lot of things that are obvious to you
  • may have to repeat himself several times before you understand what he is saying
  • has trouble picking up the main ideas in conversations with you
  • has problems shifting focus from one subject or activity to another
  • has difficulty connecting new information with information already known
  • has an idea of what he wants to say in his mind, but when he attempts to share the idea, it doesn’t come out right
  • focuses too superficially or too deeply on information you present
  • focuses too long on just one detail
  • focuses too briefly on important aspects of the conversation
  • can't distinguish between what is important to you - and what isn't

 

Resources for couples affected by ASD: 

==> Living With Aspergers: Help for Couples

==> One-on-One Counseling for Struggling Individuals & Couples Affected by Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism

 


Signs That Your ASD Partner is Approaching “Meltdown”

“My partner [with ASD] will periodically ‘meltdown’. And I would like to know what to look for ahead of time to possibly prevent these from happening, because once he starts ‘losing it’, it’s hard to put that Genie back in the bottle.”

 

A true meltdown is an intense emotional and behavioral response to “over-stimulation” (a form of distress for the individual). Meltdowns are triggered by a fight-or-flight response, which releases adrenaline into the blood stream, creating heightened anxiety and causing the person with autism spectrum disorder to switch to an instinctual survival mode.
 

Common Features of Meltdowns—

  • transitions may trigger a meltdown
  • novel situations or sudden change can elicit a meltdown
  • meltdowns are time-limited
  • meltdowns are due to overwhelming stimulation
  • meltdowns are caused by sensory or mental overload, sometime in conjunction with each other
  • meltdowns are a reaction to severe stress, although the stress may not be readily apparent to an observer
  • cognitive dysfunction, perceptual distortion, and narrowing of sensory experience are associated with meltdowns
  • people in the middle of a meltdown will likely become hypo-sensitive or hyper-sensitive to pain
  • after the meltdown, there may be intense feelings of shame, remorse or humiliation, and a fear that relationships have been harmed beyond repair


Causes of Meltdown—

  • the individual does not receive understandable answers to questions
  • he or she is taken by surprise
  • is given too many choices
  • is given open-ended or vaguely defined tasks
  • has a sensory overload
  • does not understand the reason for sudden change


Warning Signs of Meltdowns—

  • stuttering or showing pressured speech
  • repeating words or phrases over and over
  • perseverating on one topic
  • pacing back in forth or in circles
  • increasing self-stimulatory behaviors (e.g., wringing of hands)
  • extreme resistance to disengaging from a ritual or routine
  • experiencing difficulty answering questions (cognitive breakdown)
  • becoming mute
  • becoming very quiet and shutting down
  • becoming defensive, argumentative, blaming, critical, etc.
  • yelling, cussing



It's important for NT partners to realize that the level of stress in the ASD individual is directly correlated with the amount of data that needs to be processed – and the amount of data that needs to be processed is directly correlated to how much sensory data is picked up and the complexity of the person's personal planning. A logical and consistent structure often helps these individuals.

 

Resources for couples affected by ASD: 

==> Living With Aspergers: Help for Couples

==> One-on-One Counseling for Struggling Individuals & Couples Affected by Asperger's and High-Functioning Autism

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